Captain Blake's Home Archive

She closed her eyes and rested against him. There was no doubt that if Evrand lived, she would do the right thing... But she would hurt deeply for having to be away from Blake. But Evrand would have come to her by now if he lived... Her soul belonged to Blake... If it didn't, he wouldn't have heard her on the wind... Their bond was one for the books, that was for sure!

Camilla pressed her lips to his again, and she snuggled closer. Her hand took his and she guided it to her hip, and she whispered against his mouth, "You have my soul, always, Devrin Blake."

The next day, she requested a lounger be placed in the kitchen near the window. It was rainy and cold, so she couldn't go outside. Ugh, she wished she wasn't so tired all the time, she had so much to do. She dozed off and on, and listened to the sound of her in laws. Her hand seemed to rest always on her belly, her eyes fixed on the window for a time. Her mother in law seemed to hover as much as her son, making sure her needs were taken care of. Camilla was distracted, though, until a servant came in and said to her, "M'lady, you've more pretty gowns from the dressmaker, would ye like me to have them hung or pressed?"

"Hang them, please... I'll not be wearing them for a time."
The girl curtsied and left.

She drew her knees up and rested her chin on them, saying to Blake's mother, "I wish to try and walk soon. I feel restless."

"To be fair," she said as she took the offered arm, grunting and struggling to her weak legs, "I wouldn't have met your son if I wasn't." She sighed and wobbled for a moment, then took a few, hesitant steps... her left foot seemed to drag a little, she couldn't tell if it was just numb from inactivity or she couldn't feel it. Fire also shot through her lower back, and she bit her tongue to stifle the pained whimper. She was determined to be normal, even though one could clearly see the affects the possession had on her.

As soon as they were one step too far, Camilla's legs buckled and she grabbed for something more solid, doing her best not to show her distress. She ducked her head as soon as she was supported against the counter, panting..

"I'm fine," she wheezed, white knuckled. "I'm alive, that counts for something, yes?" And then she leaned her head on the counter and saying, "The pain will pass... It will... It has to..." But it wasn't. She would take some deep breaths and force herself back up, getting back to the lounger in twice as long as it took to get to the counter. She lay on her side, grabbing for her pillow and hiding her face in it so she could muffle the moan.

Pain still radiated through her back after several minutes.

She took her face from the pillow and took the tea thankfully... Then she downed it, ignoring the heat. She was starting to get drowsy as Blake sat next to her and she sought his hand with hers, she looked at him and said, "Can't do it again..." She lay her cheek on his chest and said, "Loathe confinement, though." She needed to be able to move freely, to not need to be carried around. She looked up at him drowsily, then, mumbling, "Hate this."

Camilla wracked her brain for a solution. Perhaps someone could make some kind of wheelchair?

She felt herself sink into a funk that she kept to herself for the most part, not complaining about the pain when she had every right to. She simply set her chin on his shoulder and told herself she wasn't fighting for herself, but for them. The tea was doing the job, she snuggled against Blake and sighed sleepily.

She awoke with a start later on, and realized someone had carried her to bed. It was still raining and the sun was still up. She lay there with her thoughts for a while, pondering on things that could help her be independent again. Sinking into despair was happening already, she couldn't let it drag her down.

Camilla rang the stupid bell that they had given her... It was hardly ever touched because she was stubborn... And she waited for a staff member to appear. When her lady's maid appeared, she said, "Please let my husband know I'll take dinner with him in here tonight, I'm not up for moving about. Please also tell my dear mother in law so she knows not to have the table set for us. I shall like help to get a bath, however, and I'd like to wear something comfortable after. Please inform the butler I wish to see him." After the butler came in, she said, "I'd like you to inform the staff that we need to prepare for cooler months, but don't rush about it... I'd like to keep the lighter drapes for as long as we can get away with it, the heavy drapes are depressing..." She saw the butler smile as she took on her role as Mistress of the house, something she hadn't really done yet. She was a lot more reasonable than his previous employer, he was only too happy to do his work.

"Please send word to the dressmaker that I wish for her to make new gowns for the master's mother, I saw the look in her eyes when she saw mine. And lastly, please do not let the rest of the staff act gloomy... I'm not dead and it doesn't help me to see sadness or pity. I'm ready for my bath now. Poppycock if the healers think it doesn't help."

"I won't pretend to know if that is true or not, my love..." She felt so much nicer after a long soak. It did much to loosen muscle knots that didn't help the pain. She wasn't particularly hungry but forced herself to eat as much as she could, thinking of her daughter's life more than hers.

She was hungrier than she thought, for the food was gone pretty fast. "In reality, it might never happen... and that is not me being a pessimist, love... It's very painful to walk. I nearly passed out from taking a few steps. My left foot has no feeling, either."

"I... don't know. I've been trying so hard but..." She sighed and set her empty bowl aside, "I'm just tired right now. I've got to stay calm for our babe, aye?" She rested her palm on her belly, then said, "She is my priority. I'm so scared she'll be hurt or will die within me if I push too much."

"Aye," she agreed, though her brow remained puckered as she settled against his chest...

She didn't sleep much that night, for her mind was crawling with memories she had been locked from while possessed by the ghost of her ancestor. She'd likely be forever haunted by what happened. She eventually quietly got helped into a hot bath again and told the maidservants she'd ring when she was ready...

She stared up at the ceiling for the rest of the night, though relaxed into sleep off and on, only waking to replace chilled water with warm throughout the night. It was the most comfortable she had been in the days since coming home. She came out eventually... Some time in the wee hours of the morning before sunup.

Camilla waited until she was alone with Blake again before tracing his scar with the tip of her finger. She then nuzzled his neck and kissed along the scruff, trying to wake him. Her mouth eventually found his for a hungry kiss, and if that didn't wake him either, she would persist.